The Moving Chairs

For the last two or maybe three weeks I have been fighting a losing battle with a chair from the dinner table that seems to move on its own. It suddenly started doing this after I removed the center leaf from the table. I have come to believe we have a poltergeist in our home. Daily, I would move the chair back under the table, next to where the other chairs are and then somehow, someway it would end up next to the couch some 4 or 5 feet away. Then on other days it would be moved only three feet to in front of the kitchen island. It left me perplexed. I finally put the leaf back in the table just to make the ghost happy again and so it would leave the chair alone. It seems to have worked. This morning all four chairs were right where I left them last night. Then my wife says to me as she is heading out the door, “Thanks for putting the leaf back in the table for me. Now I don’t have to move the friggin’ chair around jus’ to read the news paper.” She really frightens me sometimes…

Real Snow

Dad grew up in Iowa’s snow country before moving to Oklahoma. Occasionally a light snow would blanket the valley floor along the north coast of California. But it would soon disappear as the sun rose to its summit in the daytime sky.

Miniature snowmen of about one or two feet would suddenly appear. It was all that could be mustered from such a snowfall. And riding a piece of cardboard down a snow covered hillside was no more or less exciting than a grass slope in the summer.

Yet snow of any kind would shut down school for the day. Every child dreams of this and must take advantage of it. It is an obligation to say the least.

When Tommy was eighteen he saw his first real snow. It was Thanksgiving Day in Cheyenne, Wyoming. Over two feet of the fluffy white stuff fell in a single sleep. Tommy thought all that snow was so exciting, until he had to dig his way out of his home.

Dad had told him and Adam about how the snow would drift so high against his parent’s home, which he would have to climb out the second story window just to get to school. Then Dad would have to walk two miles to get to school. Suddenly Tommy appreciated that story and found himself believing every word too.

He had just purchased a brand new baby blue Ford pick-up truck also. The night before the snow fell, he drove it home from the car lot. Tommy was proud of his truck. Now he could go camping and fishing and hiking and he didn’t have to depend on anyone else for a ride.

Tommy walked out to the parking lot and looked around. Snow blanketed everything. Nothing looked the same, so Tommy did not panic when he could not find his truck at first.

He was certain he had parked the truck right there under the telephone pole with the street lamp on it. It was close to the curb, but now he couldn’t find the curb. All that Tommy could see was a gigantic mound of snow.

Then it dawned on Tommy and he felt a surge of panic. The snowplow had buried his brand new baby blue Ford pick-up truck under all of that snow. The pile was nearly thirty feet high and his next-door neighbors’ red Datsun was half buried too.

After calling the base commander and then his commanding officer, Tommy resigned himself to the fact that he’d have to wait to drive his brand new baby blue Ford pick-up truck. He ended up walking to work.

Two hours later Tommy was at work when he recalled what Dad used to say about not living in Iowa. “Here in Northern California, you don’t have to shovel rain,” he could hear Dad say.

It was late April when Tommy finally got to drive his brand new baby blue Ford pick-up truck.

Making Lists

At first I figured I really had nothing to write about. Then a friend at church said, “Have you ever made a list of things you find interesting about yourself?” She wasn’t speaking directly to me or the idea for an article, but her question triggered an idea. It took me a while and a little looking through a couple of other lists before I got a good idea of how to proceed. This is what I came up with for myself. The challenge is to see if you can create one of your own. Please feel free to use mine as an example. I am not afraid to cry at weddings, movies, funerals or from laughing to hard. I try to practice what I preach. I tell it as it is and not how I want it. I make people mad because I won’t kiss up to them. I like speaking to large groups of people. I like to preach the gospel when invited too. I am a show-off and a mild flirt. I do not read most newspapers because of their poor writing. I don’t watch the major TV news or CNN. I hate crossword puzzles; they’re a waste of my time. I enjoy researching information. I’m a good Uncle and a great Dad. I see things as they are rather than as they should be. I am not afraid to say what needs to be said. I am extremely loyal; even beyond reason. I wear tighty-whities. I refuse to play dumb. I am too hard on myself. I am too assertive to the point of being too aggressive. I am not afraid to tell a person that I love them. I am a Christ-follower. I know a little bit about a lot of stuff. I hate working on engines but love first aid work. I enjoy the company of women rather than men. I am capable of being very mean and vicious in a fight. I fight dirty and to win. I will kill if need be. I do not enjoy television sports. I am an alcoholic and I love the taste of beer. I can hold a grudge at times. I can also be very forgiving. I have strong legs and a quick temper. I do not forgive myself easily. I am an outdoor person. I like shopping at Wal-Mart. I am only one flavor; vanilla. There are other things I could put here, but for now this will do. Besides I have to leave something for later articles. Oh, and on one more thing, I don’t enjoy making lists.